Stole it right from my mouth

Sometimes it feels like you are the only one in the world and it seems like your problem is the only problem in the world but as you go along, you will notice that other people with the right sensible mind faces what you face as well...as a single late 20something going 30something gay man going about making sense of the world.

In general, I found that gay men, most of them fall into this category, quote unquote from another blogger:

"that pair of shoes, that I-phone, Grinder, dating this and dating that, going to market place, being noticed in Facebook, and wishing someelse would give me his heart, sex, people gaining more fans, or either somebody wanted some photographer to take their picture and enter the hall of fame, or somebody wanted to get into a chinese hunk contest"

I think what's missing from that list would be the gyming, body perfection part which annoys the hell out of me - but then again what can I say? to each is their own isn't it? And then there are some decent ones but somehow it's not about me being choosy or anyhing...just doesn't click with some nice guys out there and it's sad...like this:

I have tried with guys who are very into me but i just dun feel the kind of affection i had on my ex. No sexual desire, no increase heartbeat, no little silly thoughts of looking at the phone waiting for his call and yet writing one simple sms over like 100 times to make sure ur thoughts is clearly delivered even if you just want to say good nite. and when u dun hav such feelings, typically it end up that after a while, i have to apologize and tell them i cant, cause it just doesnt feel right. I feel bad to have to tell it, but i know it feels even worse on them, hope being raised and then fall so hard. There are people whom i ilike but dun like me, the same happens. I know how painful it is, but yet knowing how they feel being in that position, i know its neither their fault. It just not the right match...

So, really what can you do? Where can you find him? There are some decent ones I guess laying around here and there, some no doubt taken or others too hurt to resurface ever again. I only have a thing about guys who can have decent conversation in decent/socially acceptable English. Seems like very very hard to find. And I have to admit, I have pass over/rejected guys over that basis.

Top jobs only for those who know the language well
PETALING JAYA: It does not matter if you are top of your class or have a string of degrees, that dream job will not be yours unless you can speak and write well in English.

Minding our language
Proficiency in English is vital in today’s world and Malaysia needs to arrest the decline urgently if it wants to remain competitive.

That special edge
COMMUNICATING in English is not the biggest concern for Universiti Teknologi Mara third year Law student Karl Rafiq Nadzarin when applying for a job or going for an interview.

But that doesn't mean one can give up just yet. You know what they say, will never know until you are 6 feet under.
At least I know I am not the only one with these problems.