A helping hand
Maybe I should stop using tags like reflections and pondering...seems like every post here one way or another falls under those category, no? Anyway I digress alot, don't I?
Recently I am helping the....well technically I can't call him ex though that's Queen Bitch label him. But anyway, I will use the word HIM. Where was I? Yup, so I am helping in the job department and it actually started before he dumped me. I was very concerned about the path that HE is taking in HIS current place and have always urged HIM to rejoin agency. Being a creative person, it's important to build a proper portfolio and HE's not getting any younger.
The creative industry is rather unforgiving when it comes to a few things: age and also lack of awards/proof of good work so when you care for someone and if you are from the same background, that is the sort of thing that you do.
I supposed my friends or friend will kill me if they find out that I am still helping HIM. Maybe you can say that HE is using me (I like to think otherwise) but to me it doesn't matter even if he is. That's the thing about caring for someone. You don't just stop caring immediately when they uttered words that forever change you and sliced your heart. You keep on caring for them and wanting them to do well. If I put aside our drama, HE is a rather unlucky BOY who just didn't really get much chances or break in his life.
So I managed to snag HIM two interviews, I told HIM I won't rest until I get HIM somewhere and then perhaps I can learn to slow down and perhaps care for HIM less? I don't know. It got down to some dire state lately that I prayed for a break for HIM and HE got a call the very next day. Now that's what I called 'thank God'. So what's the point of this? Am I looking for recognition or to show that I am a bigger man that that? I don't know. I just want to see him happy. Happy with a job and even hopefully happy to find someone that will take care of him.
Maybe I am being silly but I just can't help it. I just do it.
Recently I am helping the....well technically I can't call him ex though that's Queen Bitch label him. But anyway, I will use the word HIM. Where was I? Yup, so I am helping in the job department and it actually started before he dumped me. I was very concerned about the path that HE is taking in HIS current place and have always urged HIM to rejoin agency. Being a creative person, it's important to build a proper portfolio and HE's not getting any younger.
The creative industry is rather unforgiving when it comes to a few things: age and also lack of awards/proof of good work so when you care for someone and if you are from the same background, that is the sort of thing that you do.
I supposed my friends or friend will kill me if they find out that I am still helping HIM. Maybe you can say that HE is using me (I like to think otherwise) but to me it doesn't matter even if he is. That's the thing about caring for someone. You don't just stop caring immediately when they uttered words that forever change you and sliced your heart. You keep on caring for them and wanting them to do well. If I put aside our drama, HE is a rather unlucky BOY who just didn't really get much chances or break in his life.
So I managed to snag HIM two interviews, I told HIM I won't rest until I get HIM somewhere and then perhaps I can learn to slow down and perhaps care for HIM less? I don't know. It got down to some dire state lately that I prayed for a break for HIM and HE got a call the very next day. Now that's what I called 'thank God'. So what's the point of this? Am I looking for recognition or to show that I am a bigger man that that? I don't know. I just want to see him happy. Happy with a job and even hopefully happy to find someone that will take care of him.
Maybe I am being silly but I just can't help it. I just do it.
Comments
But yea, it sure isnt easy... I think i would tend to do that kind of things too.. still helping my ex whenever i can but at the same time feel the ache...
cheers,, u r great man..