It's not easy for me to take things easy. Yes, me the person who constantly rush through deadlines (yes, your work was due yesterday) with precise timing and budget for delivery has to take a seat. Not just any seat but the backseat and then learn how to take off all the hats that I have learnt to wear over the years, stripping off one layer by one layer and truly understand the meaning of going with the flow and chilling aka taking it easy.
Sometimes when it comes to the matter of the heart and when it involves another person, it's not as clear cut as I-want-it-now-and-I-want-it-this-way. I have to say that this has so far fast becoming the greatest lesson that I will ever learn. I know that at work, my low tolerance for shit has gotten me in small troubles here and there before and I am glad to say that I have mellowed down slightly over the years but this is my biggest challenge yet.
But it's not too bad, when you actually stop, you have time to breath and look at things from broader perspective and evaluate the things that happened. It also gives the party some space and room to make changes and also to be spontaneous. Isn't it part of the beautiful side of getting involved at the first place? So right now I am ok with not knowing what is the next plan of action, not knowing where this will lead us and not knowing what will happen. It's very come what may and I am ok with it. Or least I am trying.
Believe me when I say that getting here has been painful but then again, nothing is gain without pain. Just hope for less in the future.