Discontent
As I am writing this, disgusting stuff are flowing freely from my nostrils as side effect from my sore throat (not from cock sucking, you perverts!). I fear the end if near for me. I am talking about fever. Everytime I get sore throat, just as predictable as my life it will be followed by flu and then stupid fever. And everytime I have fever (I blame it on delirium) I will desperately wished I have a boyfriend. It doesn't make sense at all, I mean I should at least wished for a doctor boyfriend or something, what good will a stupid man do if you are sick. They can't do anything and hell no, sex aint good when you are sick.
So why on earth do I desperately want a boyfriend?
I was flipping through the newspaper yesterday as part of my job (yes, honey I work in a glamourous building with glamourous lobby and glamorous reception area and part of this glamourous lifestyle includes cutting newspaper and getting my hands dirty) and was really appalled to read about many nasty things happening to many people, all around the world. Yeah yeah yeah you heard it all before. I aint gonna preach about world peace and all those 'shit'. Those 'shits' I can assure you, everyone is well aware of but nobody is doing a damn thing about it. What I wanted to say is, being the lucky minger that I am, why am I still unhappy?
Looking at myself, I am considered extremely lucky. Good job, good friends, never knew the true meaning of hunger and fear for one's life and here I am, still complaning. Many a times I look at people who have less than me and as sick as it sounds, actually find solace in the things that I have. I even advised a few friends not to always look at people who are far better and well off because that will only make us unhappy and discontent.
Perhaps sometimes I can't help it because it's in my nature to want what I can't get. I remembered coming out at a young age and looking for love in all the wrong places. I am very blessed with my family and friends' love for me but I am always craving for that romantic type love. The more I look for it, the unhappier I get. I reasoned what makes me gay is actually the fact that I want to fuck a guy, so how can I be gay when I don't have anyone or anything for that matter to fuck? Of course those are just naive thinking at that time. Am I wiser these days? Sadly no. I still want what I can't get. Unlike other material things in life, I have always believed in working hard to get them and I did. What frustrates me is the fact that no matter how hard I work or try, you cannot make or buy a boyfriend. It's nothing something that I can control and that leaves me powerless.
If Devil himself offered me like millions of pounds in exchange for love, I will do it gladly. After all, with tons of money, I can make the life of people who have been there for me through thick and thin better and happier. Why should it all be given up for someone who was not there for the bad times and could leave you at anytime? Sadly, no such bargain exist. So in the meantime, I just have to stay as contented as I can get. Ok, stop smoking bitch!
So why on earth do I desperately want a boyfriend?
I was flipping through the newspaper yesterday as part of my job (yes, honey I work in a glamourous building with glamourous lobby and glamorous reception area and part of this glamourous lifestyle includes cutting newspaper and getting my hands dirty) and was really appalled to read about many nasty things happening to many people, all around the world. Yeah yeah yeah you heard it all before. I aint gonna preach about world peace and all those 'shit'. Those 'shits' I can assure you, everyone is well aware of but nobody is doing a damn thing about it. What I wanted to say is, being the lucky minger that I am, why am I still unhappy?
Looking at myself, I am considered extremely lucky. Good job, good friends, never knew the true meaning of hunger and fear for one's life and here I am, still complaning. Many a times I look at people who have less than me and as sick as it sounds, actually find solace in the things that I have. I even advised a few friends not to always look at people who are far better and well off because that will only make us unhappy and discontent.
Perhaps sometimes I can't help it because it's in my nature to want what I can't get. I remembered coming out at a young age and looking for love in all the wrong places. I am very blessed with my family and friends' love for me but I am always craving for that romantic type love. The more I look for it, the unhappier I get. I reasoned what makes me gay is actually the fact that I want to fuck a guy, so how can I be gay when I don't have anyone or anything for that matter to fuck? Of course those are just naive thinking at that time. Am I wiser these days? Sadly no. I still want what I can't get. Unlike other material things in life, I have always believed in working hard to get them and I did. What frustrates me is the fact that no matter how hard I work or try, you cannot make or buy a boyfriend. It's nothing something that I can control and that leaves me powerless.
If Devil himself offered me like millions of pounds in exchange for love, I will do it gladly. After all, with tons of money, I can make the life of people who have been there for me through thick and thin better and happier. Why should it all be given up for someone who was not there for the bad times and could leave you at anytime? Sadly, no such bargain exist. So in the meantime, I just have to stay as contented as I can get. Ok, stop smoking bitch!
Comments
Pup!
Get a dog.
Or a pussy... I mean cat.